At the beginning of the internet, there was very little. However, the people were amazed at the speed at which they could send mail and shop on sites such as ebay. The they did not see the truth though, the beginnings of the internet were drab. As people turned to the internet as a source of entertainment, the only thing they could find was fail. The internet, completely void of win and lols, was a desolate wasteland. Upon finding this, I muttered the only thing I could at the time:
"Fuck you internet, fuck you."
I fell into despair. I frantically searched for any source or win, but I only fell upon more fail. As more and more people blindly hoarded to the spectacle of this new "interweb," they became distracted by the warm glow, completely oblivious to the intense fail surrounding them. I became enraged, and began to yell at the top of my lungs:
"Get away from the internet, I'm cutting it down!"
The people screamed in terror and rage as their new-found source of technological stimulation was threatened. With my chainsaw-chucks of failslaying in hand, I rushed towards the source of the evil. Just as I was about to strike it down, I heard a small voice through the wailing:
"Oh hi, I come from the internet."
The small creature exited from the darkness, bringing with him much lols and win, and thus was born the lolcat, a gift from ceiling cat himself. From then on out, the interwebs were blessed with much greatness and hilarity, reserving the fail for only the worst of the worst: twilight fans.