I was going through registering for my classes next semester, and I though about how they need to make a school for people like me- internet college. 

Sure, learning stuff like I.T. may help in real life applications, but who teaches the ignorant masses how to stay away from viruses, how to keep from feeding trolls, or even how to troll for themselves?  Ladies and Mentlegen, I bring you Troll University.

One of the most important classes would be troll science. Once our resident engineers gain enough experience, we could power the entire school, or even the entire world.  Of course, there would have to be chapter on Fucking magnets and how they work, as well as the difference between miracles and magic.

One class that I saw in the catalog here could actually be taught at T.U.- Native Plant Identification.  Why?  Because it's important shit!

Grass is native right?

I've totally got the faculty worked out too.  Music would be taught by Hipster Kitty, however I think the students would get some biased opinions.  The Courage and Insanity wolfs would probably be awesome P.E. coaches.  Try to slack off now- especially you fatty, go run another lap.  In order to counter this, you could probably have advice dog as a counselor...

Except for college.  You have to pay to fail here.

Just to round it out, Joseph Ducreux can teach English.