Adding to the list of "reasons why I shouldn't be let out of the cave and into society", I bring you public trolling. Nothing really breaks the ice quite like the burning fires of rage you get from pissing somebody off.

Soup or Salad? Yes!

Embarrass your friends and family while at the same time getting stranger to leave you alone?   How do I do this?  Acting like you're a crazy person- running around shouting various obscenities while wearing no pants works- but if you want to piss off more then just the police, you're gonna have to set the bar even higher.  This ain't no flicking someone in the nose after making them look at some fake spot on their tie.


If you're like me, you can just suddenly ruin the atmosphere anywhere.  "Hey, it looks like you two are making out over here, want to hear about this nasty ingrown hair I had?"  "Your grandma died?  Ah man, that sucks.  Did she drop any good loot?"  Making judgments about people around you very loudly so that they can hear you work wonders too.  Sure, it seems kind of childish, but it also adds to the embarrassment factor, AND it makes everyone feel uncomfortable.  "Oh god, why is he saying that, doesn't he know people can hear him, I feel so bad."  You know that feeling.

Or you can just take the path of least resistance, and just do things that you know will piss people off.  A prime example? Mustard worshipers:  "Putting ketchup on a hod-dog should be a crime."  Well if you are one of these people, you should avert your eyes now.

The Troll-Dog

It's like taking a black man to a KKK meeting.  I'm guessing the response would be something between "Why would you do that?" and "Burn in hell."  Well then, mission accomplished.