Genitals

For those of you watching porn right now (why are you reading this post?) the thing you're probably watching  for is genitals being put into other genitals (as well as other orifices.)  Personally I like seeing things like tan lines and navels, but those can only get you so far.  The real deal is stuff like this:

Not porn, but close.  Via also not pornblog.

For those of you who aren't up on science terms, I'll use the words "vagoo" and "pen0r" for now. If you are still unsure, just go watch some porn. You'll understand eventually.  So tell me, which one is your favorite?

My ex girlfriend always used to say she likes how 'girly bits' look better than 'manly bits'. I can generally agree, although some people may look at the female reproductive organ as some weird monster out of a B-movie.

"Daddy, what does a vagina look like."
"It looks like a beautiful rose."
"What about after sex?"
"Well son, have you ever seen a bulldog eating mayo?"
ohm nom nom
As for pen0rs, I don't know much to say that wouldn't make me sound gay.   I could describe the way the veins bulge or how some curve in weird directions, or how I can even identify some male porn stars by these attributes, but that would just be weird.  To be fair, I also recognize nipples too.

So what happens when you combine the two?  That's when the magic happens.  I believe I explained in an older post:

"A person inside of a person (that's called sex.)"

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, this would be the root of all porn.  Sex.  No, this isn't suddenly a Sex Ed blog.  After all, porn eliminates the need for that class.  Except that it doesn't have a disclaimer that you shouldn't hit your partner in the face with your pen0r during a BJ. Girls don't like that.

3 Response to "Genitals"

  1. Lemons Don't Make Lemonade July 28, 2011 at 4:28 AM
    LOL. "Bulldog eating mayo" ----GENIUS.

    I'm starting to REALLY like your blog, probably because the dirty content makes me happy.

    Vaginas are mysterious objects. They're a hell of a lot more complicated than a dick.
  2. LoneIslander July 29, 2011 at 12:45 PM
    My friend describe a vagina as a nasty axe wound that would never heal, guess that's another way of putting it.

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