Erika's Guide to the Internet

Sup faggots.

My name is Erika. You may know me from BRB - Going Insane ~ the blog that brings you such delightful readings as Necrophilia, Cannibalism and, last but not least, Animals Doing It.

So basically, I hacked into Punk1119's Blogger account [lol] while he's away at his faggy convention or whatever.

He really shouldn't have set his password to
"password"
-_-

So The Troll Man told me that you guys suck and he hates you all and that you all need to l2interwebz. To which I nodded in total concurrence (my followers suck too).... until. What was that?? Your followers don't know how to internet?? 0_0 

I came as soon as I heard! And I come bearing a glorious gift. The gift.... of wisdom.

Unfortunately, being the dumb whore that I am, I have no wisdom to contribute.

So today, I'm gunna be telling you n00bz about....
ZEE INTERWEBZZZZ
According to me anyways.
So most likely it's gunna be a steaming pile of shit. 


And without further ado....
I present to you....

Erika's Guide
to
Winning the Internet



Step #1
Never be yourself. They say that in life, you should always be yourself. This is a load of bollocks. You should never be yourself. Cus nobody likes you. And why be yourself if you can be someone better??

 This is me.

Step #2
Decide on your Battleground. Whether it's a particular forum, IRC channel, imageboard, website, blahblahblah. WTF-ever. The protip is to lurk. Can't have you going into battle unprepared now, can we. Start small or you might get butthurt. Each battleground has its own rules of battle to comply to. Learn them well, my little grasshoppers.

My IRC channel looks like this.
Except I am the Emperor
so shitheads know to 
suck my cock or face my wrath.

Step #3
Choose your weapons. Be fucking imaginative. Only you know your own skills, so bring them to the fucking battle. Also, different weapons work on different people. So don't try to outwit somebody who's blatantly more intelligent than you. Look for people's weaknesses. The three best weapons to have imo are intelligence, anonymity, and most importantly, apathy.

-What's that? You doxxed me?-
The moment that you come across to your opponent as butthurt, you lose.
Even if you are crying your faggy little emo eyes out
FFS DON'T TELL THEM!!!


So yeah. That's my guide to winning the internet. There's a lot more to it, but I don't think you're quite ready just yet. Maybe Troll Man will share with you the more advanced battle guide. In time. When he too feels that you are ready.

So fly, my pretties, fly!!

Rape and torture
whomever
dares get in your way!!

Kill it with fire!!

5 Response to "Erika's Guide to the Internet"

  1. T. Roger Thomas May 29, 2011 at 6:20 PM
    Little Chung-Li is adorable until she starts kicking.
  2. Punk1119 May 29, 2011 at 8:16 PM
    Hey guy what's going on in this.. oh no. It seems Erika has been busy. But even I learned a thing or two!
  3. Erika May 29, 2011 at 10:09 PM
    Hey, Punk1119!! Welcome back.... apologies for taking over your blog. But let's face it. Urgent words needed to be had.
  4. Trelin May 30, 2011 at 8:58 AM
    You forgot to mention that Logic and Reason are the weakest weapons you can have on the intertoobs.
  5. ed May 30, 2011 at 6:55 PM
    professional lurker checking in

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