I've been really busy lately.  Not with school work, nor with a job.  I've been busy playing with more blocks.  Yes, Minecraft has completely taken over my life.  Now I don't normally post Minecraft videos, since there's like, 7 billion of them on youtube anyways.  However, this one make me laugh in a sort of portal/300 sort of way.  You will understand why.

The Cake is a Lie, and yes, the arrows will block out the sun.  Let them eat cake in the shade.  I don't think I could fit anymore memes in here.  That's right, Marie Antoinette is now a meme.  Get over it.  I might upload a video of my minecraft world sometimes for a video blog.


Another game I would like to play (but would never be able to because it doesn't exist)  is "Crab Nicholson Extreme Sleepover Text Adventure."  His claws are sharp, but his heart is made of gold.  Or Cigarettes.  If only I lived near this game store so I could buy this one and only copy.

I hope he uses that money he got from the game to buy a new camera. But I think he probably paid more for the pack of cigarettes than they gave him for the game. Smokes are expensive, man.

Being a broken-up, green texted story makes it even better.

Whoa whoa whoa, fucked up story bro. Let’s try something a little bit different.

Screw punctuation.

I CAN HABEEBE IT!  I can believe that nobody on 4chan can tell a real story.  Or even format it in a way that looks like it would be acceptable to be put in any real or credible publication.  Or end it in some sensicle way.  Yes, sensicle is a real word.  Don't compare me to these other fools on 4chan.  I can write a real story.  Without breaking it up into small sentences.  Damn it.

Ok, so here we have "The Internets".

It's pretty much the biggest freaking thing on the planet. Bigger than whales, bigger than a big gulp (you know, the drink that could drown a small child), even bigger than Kanye West's ego. Ya, it's pretty big. The internet doesn't mess around. But as the saying goes, the bigger they are, the bigger the earthquake is when they fall. Or something like that.

Of corse people have to run this massive mass of porn, memes, retards, and the complete collection of human knowledge known as Wikipedia. Who are the true rulers you ask? Some people would say that anon, or even the race known as "trolls" control it, but they would be wrong [we just manage it]. Through much research (and by research, I mean looking at lots and lots of funny pictures of cats speaking really horrible English) I realized that the true rulers consisted of only 4 men:

Al Gore
Bill Gates
Christopher Poole
“The Encoder”

Why these four? Back in the year 2000, the internet was born in a blinding flash out of a small garage owned by one of these men, a man called "Gore." He knew he could not contain all of the power by himself, so he split it up with three of his closest buddies. Mr. Gates, the most well know of the four, was put in charge of the upkeep, and to gain money for this he was allowed to sell pieces of glitchy software for exorbitant prices, which he continues today, also under the alias of "Steve Jobs."

Sir Christopher Poole is probably better known by his moniker, Moot of 4chan.  He was of course put in charge of the darker side of the internet which would inevitably spring up, and by pure chance, grow to envelop almost all of the internet.  Later anon would come to his aid to futher back him up.

The last ruler, know only as "The Encoder" is very mysterious.  Very little is know about him.  Few even know of his existence, but there are clues out there, including one very interesting captcha.  We can only guess he makes the rules here, as shown by these. 

Each of these men have one of these, as I like to call it an "internet switch."
With this, they can control their individual sectors, but if they were ever to get together and activate all four of them simultaneously, well, we can only imagine what happens then.

Today, I told myself "Self, today is 4chan Friday, so I'm gonna be sure to write something extra funny."  But now that it's past midnight making it Saturday, I guess you'll have to deal with the regular B.S. I throw at you.  But I am doing /3/ and /rs/, so cheer up! 

No, /3/ isn't another chan.  After visiting 7chan, I don't think I could bear to leave the safety of my home.  /3/ actually stands for 3DCG.  Great, another acronym to further confuse me.  Although I think it does actually stand for 3d computer grapics.  Or 3 dudes cutting grass.  I'm not entirely sure though.  There are a lot of 3d looking pictures though.

You ever wonder how they get realistic looking models into video games and stuff?  They skin a person, and then lay it out flat, then take a picture of it.

This... really creeps me out.

Then you can wrap it around a human-head shaped 3d wireframe and create the model.  That or they just take a bunch of pictures from different angles and stitch them together.  That probably works better, in a much less manslaughter sort of way.

/rs/ stands for Rapidshares, aka the quickest way to spread viruses, porn, and pirated versions of software.  Unlike torrenting, you don't even have to download any other software to get it.  Which means only downloading from your browser, which pretty much sucks.  But then again, you will have less of a paper trail of sorts when downloading pronz and warez.  When the feds (or your mom) shows up at your door, you don't have to clear your uTorrent stats, you just have to delete the illegal shit and plead the 5th, whatever that is.

So I was trying to think up good stuff to add to a post for tonight, but as I wracked my brains the only thing that I could think about was something totally unrelated; Man Butt.  OK, it's a lot less gay than it sounds.

My friend and I like to play a lot of RPG's, and while we both like to try new things, there is one thing that he will rarely do: make a female character.  Sure, a female warrior with little skinny arms looks horribly fit to carry around a massive physics defying sword of evil-smashing, but spell casters in skimpy outfits more than make up for that.  Fighting in the snow wearing nothing but lingerie totally makes sense.

I totally like making female characters.  My take on it is that if you're going to be staring at a character's butt from a 3rd person view for hours at a time, it might as well be good looking.  Not some big fat man butt.  Yes, I'm sure you could use it to smash some unsuspecting enemy's head, but seeing it twitch and bulge with veins during the process would probably make me want to hit the delete button.

Mundo goes whe... whoa man, that's nasty.

Yes, I bet RPG time with your muscle-bound bros, complete with drooling contests and steroid injecting, is a great bonding experience, but will it get you as much money as dancing in town square with your armor off?  I didn't think so.  Now then, that will be two silver.