Humbold Hijinks: Drunk Girls and Moral Decicions

Ah freshman.  You know, I spent my freshman (and sophomore) years of college a community college at home, where I was still sheltered and had consequences for staying up until 4 am and eating junk food until my teeth fell out.  I didn't even think about drinking, because my mom would beat the hell out of my ass and take my computer and throw it out in the street and have the landlord block up the internet and so on.  Freshmen who go straight off to college, however, don't have a v-chip on their life however.

"I'm a bad parent, so I'll just let technology raise my children."

Such is the case of one of my suite-mates, who decided to make jello shots using alcohol from some undisclosed source with some of her friends.  This may just be the old man in me talking, but I think there may be some risk in that, but then again, they didn't break anything.  I just hope none of the advisers look in our trash that is currently full of tons of little paper cups.

I do happen to be the oldest oldest one here in my suite at 20 years old, which feels odd, and also which scares me.  I am the old man.  The old man who is going to be old enough to buy them alcohol legally next semester. (Legally for me, not for them.  Buying alcohol for minors is, in fact, not legal.  That's a problem for later though.) As for them, they are currently out somewhere, probably building upon their jello shots.

I don't really care if they are drinking, I'm not their mom.  I don't even really care if they are drunk.  I do care if they try to get me involved though.  Cleaning up vomit is not one of my things.  However, the idea of drunk girls in my apartment is interesting, and once again, scary.  I mean, what if one of them wants to do me!?

Thus is my conundrum.  I don't want to take advantage of a drunk girl, no matter how desperate or lonely I am.  Unless they had a hinting of wanting to do me while sober.  No no no.  But they wouldn't remember it.  I would use protection.  What if I got drunk too?  No no no.  Then I wouldn't remember it.  Ah, I think I'm just going to lock myself in my room tonight...

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