The rule here at the Troll Cave is bros before hos. Cholos aren't even in the equation. But aye, they are funny.
But there's always time for anime and video games. Whether you like Haruhi or Portal, I think we can both agree on one thing: she's the best at space.
You are guilty. Guilty of not being in space. And if you missed this next one, or just flat out don't get it, you are guilty of not being on the internet enough.
TROLLS. This is a blog about trolls (and stuff). YOUTUBE. Youtube is a site where you waste time and watch videos. ANIME. It is something I like a lot. This is a combination of the three.
Also, although my roommate is Asian and likes anime just as much as me, he doesn't know karate.
Ever get that feeling when you hear or see something epic, and you're all like "who guys, whoa." Take that feeling and multiply it by 100, you get this song.
You’re probably sayin’, “Wtf, I have to sit through his videos every week, now he wants me to watch a 12 minute one?” Well, you don’t have to listen to it if you’re a girly man. If you just want the idea of the song however, just watch this:
Yes, man. Whoa. Now tell me, how many of you just had spontaneous chest hair growth? Yeah, that shit happens. But that's not all. This has all the features you could ever want, and more. True testimonies:
"This song caused my ovaries descend into my pelvis where they became testicles."
"HOLY SHIT I CAME VIKINGS RIDING BEARS"
"Holy shit, I just grew a meter-long beard."
"I never believed God was real, until I heard Daniel Heiman singing."
Well, there you have it. WOAH-OH-OH-AH-AH-AH-AAAA-HA-AH-AH-AH
After an entire week of watching porn nonstop, I don't know how well I'll adjust back to regular videos with people who are clothed. But it's so hard since a lot of regular movies are filled with so much sexual tension... and magic?
I hate that feeling when you have to choose between dealing with the Dark lord or your girlfriend. Both can be pretty horrible if you make them mad.
Good thing all problems can be taken away with memes and smooth jazz.
Yes, not even my scheduled posts can escape porn week. Now I know what you're sayin'. Troll Man, Troll Man, I thought this was a family friendly site. You can't just go and be posting porn here. How will I explain to my kids why the pretty lady has no clothes and is being stabbed by some scary guy.
Do not worry, my fellow fapping friends. Looks can be deceiving, and though something may start out phallus-looking and horrible, it may just be your dirty minds playing tricks on you.
However while all of these aren't actually real, this next video is. Unlike all the fake shit that you see in the movies (both high budget and ones you buy over the phone using an alias in order to hide your identity.)
(Embedding disabled by request + Might be too bad [or good] for this blog [Pfffffffffffff]). Video here.
Sexy, sexy, sexy. Three adjectives you could use to describe me (if you're into that kind of stuff; stuff meaning sexy people like me.) You know, I used to play saxophone. Does that make me more sexy?
Did I mention that it's 10 hours long? Put your adult diapers on, because you're bound to be wet all day from all this sexy.
And while I may listen to that for at least an hour or two, I wouldn't listen to this song for 2 seconds. Yes, the new Rebecca Black song. No, I won't post it. I'm not that horrible. Besides, this isn't called "It Came from Hell."
The last installment (for now) of Harry Potter is coming out soon, and while I pirate the previous movies, the biggest question on everybody's minds is who's hotter, Luna Lovegood or Hermiony Granger. But my vote is for this girl.
Personally I liked it when Emma Watson was still flat, but my preferences change depending on the day. Speaking of flat girls, wouldn't you be suspicious when you see a flat chest under without a face visible? That could be anybody. Like this guy.
To be honest, brown facial hair doesn't work with blonde hair.
Some people are happier than others. People who are always sad are called "depressed" and are prescribed drugs. People who constantly switch between happy and sad are called "bipolar" and are also prescribed drugs. People who are constantly happy though, they become murderers and are sent to prison...
And of course, since TF2 is now free, here's a video of it.
Add me on Steam (Nenth) if you feel like playing with me!
There are some pretty bad drivers in this world. And you just know that they're going to park badly as well. Like right in front of an exit.
It never occurred that the lack of lines or the fact that they were almost directly perpendicular to someone else meant that that was not, in fact, a spot to park. Maybe they were thinking "hey, I'll only be in there for 5 minutes, nobody will have to get out in that time." Well, at least she (saying she because, well, you know) didn't try to park on a road.
You mean the wheel acts the opposite way when backing up? Even the three cars that passed you because you were blocking both lanes were able to make a U-Turn on a 2 lane road. Did you not pay any attention?
Try to count how many times you yell "Just Go!!" through the course of this video.
We're short on time here at The Troll Cave. Talk is cheap. This kid is probably going to cost me a fortune.
This reminds me of a phrase a wise man once said to me: Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like? But obviously this kid wants someone to do him so bad that he'll do anything. Sounds like the story of my life. You know what, I bet the story of my life would be best be told with Microsoft Sam. Especially if I was on the moon.
I TOLD YOU BRO. TOLD YOU ABOUT THE MOON. Oh the trolling possibilities are endless. Video blog anyone?
Yes, we are back, this time with shower antics. Yes, you heard me right.
Believe me, there are a lot worse things that guys can do to each other in public showers (besides the obvious dropping the soap trick.) I took gym in high school. I was that fat kid who did the mile in 30 minutes. So obviously, I was afraid of what would happen if I went into the shower. So I didn't take one. And I probably stank. Luckily this kid wont.
And now for something completely creepy:
"Mommy, where do babies come from?" "Well, son... omfg what is that?"
Cheer up momma baby, I'm sure the world will accept your super sexy yet infantile body one day.
I just came back from a movie and now I have to watch even more stuff, like YouTube videos. It never ends, does it? Here's a product of Japan that I know you all will love (no, it's not like last week's box that closes it itself).
(Skip to 3:05 for the best part.)
I think a cumshot is a little past second base though... freaking second base man...
This second one, however, is something even better than humping various sports equipment.
One day the machines will rule us all. Unless instead of John Connor, these machines are built by crazy Japanese people who make them to just fall down, or even turn themselves off.
Get out of there you, you'll never be the great oppressors of mankind if you're constantly hiding in that box with nothing but a bad atitude and a pouty face. (´・ω・`) Especially if you fight amongst yourselves.
I think instead of robots, ponies will take over the world. So far they've made their way onto youtube and 4chan, which means that's the internet is already long gone.
This was actually done by one of my friends (who still won't do a guest post for me), but you can still check out his Youtube channel here. As you can see, the ponies have even reached me. As my friend says, "Don't judge me, I can't get enough of this pony shit."
Dark Shades. Explosions. Bounty Hunters. Evil Laughing. What more do you need in an action flick? This is Ace Rider!
I have a talking cat in my watch, your argument is invalid.
But what happens if you have real non-watch cats, and their are pissing on everything you know and love? You set up some sort of abomination of a trap to spray them with water.
To be honest, this could make for a pretty awesome action movie as well.
I'm all for cute anime characters, so when someone makes a video specifically for looping all of their cute lines together, that makes me happy. This role in Stein's Gate might make me like Kana Hanazawa more than Chiaka Omigawa. Tuturu~~~
Of course this video reminded me of this video, with a less cuteness, but just as many random one-liners autotuned into a song.
Oh Light, you yell so much, but it makes for a good adaptation of the K-On! op.
I HAD A UNANIMOUS DECISION WITH MYSELF TODAY (if that's even possible) THAT THIS BLOG DIDN'T HAVE ENOUGH OF AN INTERNET-LIKE FEEL, SO HERE'S A VIDEO OF A CAT.
And now for more making fun of Justin Bieber.
Beethoven has a pretty awesome voice.
Yes, Mondays suck.
Since I don't tend to leave the Cave much, I can't really do stuff like try to pick up girls, but if I tried this, I'm sure It would go well.
I'm pretty sure all the chicks who don't even know what a meme is would probably think that they're really awesome and original pick up lines. Or I would get kicked in the nuts for being creepy.
And now here's a video that you will probably listen to at least 20 times this week. Feel free to hate me.
I think this comment explains it the best:
"OMG!!! its a magical feline pastry that travls through space and time delivering happy goddness and fighting other worldly crime embodying everything good and awesome the 9 dimensions of the universe in its rainbow jet steam. POPTART CAT!!!!!!!!"
Oh women and their mouths. They really don't stop moving. They could just go on for hours about anything, whether it be nagging, shopping, or how that bitch next-door got that boob job even though she already had some decent C-cups, I mean really, does her husband make her do it? If only there was a way to just keep their mouth permanently shut... or open.
All the weird Britishisms [that could potentially be really funny euphemisms] aside, I'm sure this girl's boyfriend is a very happy guy. And on the other side of the spectrum, this guy's wife isn't so happy.
Via
I hate to see what this guy does after that time of the month.
I think Mr. Lurker says it best- Just because you can do it doesn't mean you should. But he does it anways, and with a straight face no less. Why internets, why.
This week's "it came from youtube" was a bit hard this week, because about 80% of my Youtube history is minecraft videos. I should really stop doing that. But thanks to fellow bloggers, as well as my random friends on Skype, I have been able to dig up some good videos. I think.
via
I am not responsible for any fingerprints on your screen, nor any ocd-related feelings of needing to wash your hands multiple times.
This one is just awesome for the sake of being awesome.
Freaking awesome, Japan.
Fear not, I will be making a video of my own Minecraft map soon, so you can finally see what I've been wasting my time on!
Do you like the feeling of screaming your head off until you pass out, then wake up with a sore throat and a brain hemorrhage? If so, then this video is for you!
I've watched this at least 20 times already, and it is equally funny. If anyone can figure out what creeper-mom says at :39, feel free to let me know.
And while we're on the topic of off-topic, here's this.
Wow, I don't remember this much profanity or distorted baselines in any of the Zelda music.
