The Return of the AMV's

You know, I said I was going to quit, but I just couldn't the resist the draw of songs and series just asking to be paired up.  With that in mind, I made this one.

Ookami-san came out last season, and it was one of the better ones. Since the whole thing is pretty much a spoof of every fairy tale ever, and the Paramore song pretty much goes along with the same idea, I though they would go great together. I even got the raw-unsubbed 720p version to make it look even better. This was my only truly 720p video I've made so far, and it kind of raped my computer, so I couldn't do as much as I would have liked. I still think it turned out good though.

Ryoko's Neko-neko knuckles are pretty awesome and all, but I still think that Lobster Rage Fists beat them.

But that's something for a different time, because I still have one more AMV.


It's been a while since I made an amv true to the original EVA series since the second movie came out. This was was fun for me, I like to call it "fun with transitions," just because of all the short one-liners that I had to edit around.

I don't really make this x that videos, but I don't think I can get away with calling this anything other than a Shinji x Asuka tribute. Enjoy!

Six Months

So it's been six months now since I started this blog, and it's still going strong.  I'd like to thank all of my readers and supporters for being awesome and leaving good comments (sometimes), and for getting me almost 3,000 views this month.  I am constantly thinking up fun new things to post, but this has made me realize one thing- I'm probably not a very good troll.  You know, I'm fine with going through life being mediocre, but I feel like a reaction to one of my antics would be something like this:

I even got called "the lovable troll" once.  You know what, fuck you guys. No more Mr. Nice Troll.  From now on I'm gonna quit being a lurker and get out there and make some people rage.  I've even been practicing.
So many homophobes on teh interwebs...
Apart from that, I will keep bring you funny videos, stories from around the internet, and more bad commentary on stuff. In the mean time, keep on trollin'

This week's "It Came from Youtube" will be pushed back to tomorrow, but be ready something special!

Advice

Advice on the internet is kind of like going to a whore house to find a wife.  What you get won't be what you had in mind.  The best approach I feel is to just practice complete reverse psychology. 

4chan has an advice board, but I think they should rename it "how to end up dead and/or screwed."  Asking for input on any other board is just as bad.
I wouldn't risk any form of information or fate of personal belongings on anyone from the internet.  That includes so-called "technicians"  who get paid to fix stuff.  No, the problem is with the internet, restarting my computer will do nothing.  While we're on the topic of things doing nothing, let's talk about something that will do something.  Something bad.

I know somewhere on 4chan there probably is someone who will give you a strait answer.  But they will usually get caught up between the trolls.
Deleting your windows 32 folder will speed up your computer.
(Or completely destroy your computer, results may vary. Except not. It’s almost positive that it will be the latter.  You're welcome to try it though.)

Wut?

What are you doing people?  Why are you reading this blog?  You are at work.  You should be doing work.  Your boss will catch you!

Maybe after you get off work you can go outside.  Outside is cool.  Especially at night, when you can look at the moon...
Forget it.  But you still could be doing other stuff besides looking at this blog.  You could be looking at porn instead!  Come on!
And it's all gone...  You know what, just go back to reading this blog. See if I care.

4chan (Black) Friday

Since it's the day after Thanksgiving, aka Black Friday, I though I'd go along with it.  Tonight for you, I have /g/ and /ck/- I'll explain why these are related.

/g/ stands for Technology.  Black Friday is all about driving around in traffic then pushing through hordes of people to try to get the best deals possible.  I decided to not go out today, but if I did, I would be to Best Buy to ogle the great deals (but not be able to buy any).  Instead, I looked up /g/ to see what deals there were out there.  No deals really caught my eye, but I though this was cool.

Wall computer is watching you fap.
I guess you don't need to worry about ventilation if your system is open air.  The rest of /g/ is people trying to figure out how to build computers or unbreak their old ones.

/ck/ stands for Food & Cooking.  Contrary to popular belief, it does not stand for "cock."  Since the day before Black Friday always is Thanksgiving (unless you're Canadian, eh) people always have ton of leftovers that don't look anywhere as close to as good as they did they day before.  On top of that, your relatives are probably also gone and you won't have anyone to help you dispose of your dry turkey.  But fear not!  /ck/ is there to help you create something out of your pile of food.  Or laugh at you for asking why your mashed potatoes were lumpy.  But of corse this is just for the holidays.  If you want to read more about /ck/, I wrote a longer post about it a while back.

The Curse of the Back Seat

Any anime that has a classroom setting probably has this. What is it? You probably wouldn't notice it unless someone brought it up. Let's take a look at some pictures, then find out what they all have in common.

Seitokai Yakuindomo

A Certain Magical Index

Heroman

Code Geass

Kimi ni Todoke
Yes, the main characters are all sitting in the exact same spot.  Some other anime characters that share this spot would include Light in Death Note, Rei in Evangelion, Kyon and Haruhi in The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumya... well you get the point. 

The significance of this spot?  Well in Death Note, Light is able to notice the book outside the window from that position.  But other than that, I don't know if there is a specific reason.  I think they're there so they can have plot defining monologues, or just to look out the window dreamily while the narrator reiterates said plot.  Or maybe it's just so they can eat and sleep unnoticed by the teacher.

It Came fom Youtube

Before I get into tonight videos, I'd like to tell you a story. Tonight, I mad the most amazing chili dogs ever and they were delicious. That is all. But on a similar note, here's a giant corn dog of doom.

(via)
I'm surprised myself that I've never seen this on /ck/ anywhere. It already meets their standards by having both bacon and a deep fried component.

And if a Girl eating a giant corndog isn't enough, here's one of a guy blowing up a massive balloon that looks like a boob.

Did I mention it takes 10 minutes for him to get it most of the way filled up? Feel free to skip through the majority of him huffing and puffing like a smoker with asthma, to get right to the good part of him mounting and humping it. Oh Boy!

Captcha, Episode 4: The Prequel

Just to clear things up, this isn't actually a prequel, but I just figured since it's the fourth installment that I would make it one, kind of like star wars...

You know, the Capcha is to make sure that you're a human or not. After some of these, I'm beginning to doubt my own humanity...

Equathon: it's like an equation, but in 17 parts.  Did I mention I hate math?
Just because I hate it doesn't mean I don't recognize made up numbers.  How many thousands go into a betzely again?
Haha, if you tried to type in a B, you would be wrong!  It's actually an eszett

It's like the American Flag!  I think I'll try 'merca'.

Looks like the encoder is very relentless with his attempts to stop me from postin- oh shiiiiii--
Fear not, I can save us!
Via XKCD
That will show you, encoder.  And just for the lulz:
Do trolls even drink wine?  I don't...

Commenting

The comment section on any site is like a big bulletin board on the internet. A bulletin with trolls, illiterate people, and random advertisements. Sometimes there's even a legit comment thrown in there. But most of it just makes you want to find the person who posted it, go to their house, and sodomize them with a shovel (insert visual here). This has been reiterated to death, but there really needs to be a way punch someone through the internet.

Some places have worse comments than other though.  I have to leave 4chan out though being that it is basically all comments, most of them being trolls.  Out there somewhere, there are some places that I really hope are actually trying to leave completely horrible comments on purpose.
I Can Haz Cheeseburger holds the title of most incomprehensible.  Half of the time I have to sit and try to figure out what the picture says, but reading the comments just makes my brain hurt.  It's like they took a hearing impaired monkey and told it to write out human speech phonetically.  The complete lack of anything that resembles English or grammatical rules just stumps me.  You know, I bet if cats could talk their syntax would be just fine.

Youtube comments usually revolve around putting down others tastes in music, sense of humor, making judgments on people's sexuality, and making excuses for why people hit the dislike button.  These comments usually involve something such as just plain missing the button, Justin Bieber fans plotting world destruction, or just being too enthralled by whatever the video is that they accidentally hit "dislike."  These comments are some of the shovel-sodomizing ones, but every once in a while you get something creative.
*makes witty comment about why people disliked this video in hopes of thumbs up*
I can't understand why people would go to a video that they don't like to make a comment about why they think it sucks. Maybe one day there will be some sort of way to keep people from posting retarded comments.

4chan Friday

Hello folks, time for another 4chan Friday!

Too bad, 'cause you're getting it
Tonight we have /v/ and /p/ in store for us.

/v/ stands for "The Vidya," or video games. Don't ask me why. Every otaku has his needs. Some have anime, while others have video games- they're equally as bad.
Why would you need that many dreamcasts?  Or even one for that matter.  An don't say it's to play Seamen.  I know it makes an awesome joke, but it really isn't a good game.

/p/ Stands for photography.  I like photography.  Sunsets, rain forests, rivers, nude women, you know.  With any image board, having a photography forum is a must.  And for every photography forum, someone must sneak in a picture of their penis.
I bet you looked for a penis in this picture, you suck f**k
Other times it's actually impressive and good looking scenes, like the one above.

Wallpapers

I've been playing with Rainmeter on my computer, and so lately I've also been changing up my wallpapers to go along with it. Here's some of my favorites I've been using so far.




I realized that I have a disproportionate amount of anime wallpapers.  I will post my Rainmeter setup when I'm done playing with it.

It Came From Youtube

The survival show fad makes me wonder, why even demonstrate some of this shit. Some of the things he does seem kind of extreme and random- most people wouldn't even come close to being anywhere where he goes. He goes on to describe how to avoid some danger, then leaps into whatever deadly crevice or pool of quicksand to demonstrate how to get out in the rare case you are brain dead and do actually fall in. Also, who names their kid 'Bear?'

This Ted Guy is lucky with his non-crispy bacon, if Bear were stranded out in the wild, he would most likely be left with some massive rain forest grub, or end up drinking his own piss- you know, just in case.


A movie called Troll? Why have I never been informed of this? I've been totally missing out on great movie lines such as this. Also, that guy has a fly on his forehead at 13 seconds. Just in case you didn't notice.

The Curse of Wikipedia

(via)
You know if you're on Wikipedia actually looking for information, that the project B.S. anyways.  Teachers always tell you not to go on Wikipedia for research, but they just don't want you to know where they get their information for their lesson plans.  But if you are prone to clicking on every little thing, trying to discover the secrets of the world, Wikipedia may be a tad bit distracting.

Woody

Woody from Toy Story is fucking creepy. Ignore the fact that his name is the slang word for an erection. I mean his whole reason for existing is to be played with by a child. What's worse is the real life version they made of him just seems so... creepy.

Those long fingers, that pointed mouth, those eyes!  Those eyes just seems like they're staring into your soul, or at the very least imagining weird shit to do...
Konata, watch out!
The worst part?  The fact that they made his 'parts' interchangeable with other figures, coming up with some incredibly scary combinations.  No, I don't want to be your favorite deputy!

4chan Friday

Looks like it's another episode of... *puts on glasses* ...4Chan Friday
WAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Tonight, I bring to you, in usual fashion, /po/ and /k/.

/po/ stands for Papercraft abd Oragami. Papercraft is basically making a small figurine out of a template printed on paper. While it isn't incredibly sturdy and sometimes they can come out looking shoddy, they are cheap and not too hard to make. For example, here's one I made of my favorite Bear.

(you can find the template for it at the bottom of this post.)

/k/ Stands for weapons. From the name, I though it would be a bunch of red-neck gun freaks and wanna-be war junkies. You know, those type of people who carry around a pocket knife at all times, "just in case." Then you see them one day eatin an apple with it, wondering if they washed it off after using it to gut a deer or something of that sort. However, it's obvious that these are only amatures compared to the people on /k/ though, for the fact that they have this:
What?  I'm nearsighted... 
I guess there's some decent people here, who simply like the feel of a weapon in their hands, rather than the feeling of using one to violently destroy whatever target they happen to pick.

Happy Birthday Hater

Today (well actually yesterday, but I'm still up) is my friend's birthday, and I though I would give him a shout-out. While he is not one of my blogging comrades, we have been friends since like 3rd grade, so I guess he deserves a spot or something.

For now, we'll call him Hater. He has been one of my dedicated readers since the beginning, but for as long as I've had this blog, he's been against having his own (he be hatin'), despite being more than eager to spit out topic ideas. Even if he doesn't know he is doing it...

A lot of the stuff that we talk about is pretty much random, but much of it sneaks into this blog. All of the other stuff is basically really obscure and awkward inside jokes, which sometimes even we don't know the origins. To get a general idea, this is similar to the stuff we do on a regular basis.


I can't say that our lives are as eventful as an episode of "It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia," but if my past posts are any indication, some of the stuff makes for good stories.

Weird Al

So I was listening to the radio the other day, and I heard a song with a familiar chorus. I said to myself "Hey, this song has a familiar chorus." However, it was missing something... something like an accordion. That's when I realized that it was one of the songs used in one of many polkas made by the master of parodies himself, Weird Al.


Is it weird that I remember his lyrics to the songs better than the "original" ones? And I definitely know I can't get on to American Idol by singing Albuquerque- despite the fact that I know every single word by heart. (For those of you who don't know, it's an 11 minute song about a man who leaves a life of sauerkraut and travels to a town in New Mexico, where he goes on a quest to take back his lucky snorkel from a one-nostriled man, on top of buying doughnuts and doing other things that would probably be considered manslaughter- you can't spell it without 'laughter'.) I guess I can still pass it off as another pointless talent though.

Weird Al pretty much defined the music of my childhood, and still sneaks into my present to remind me of those fun times. Keep it up, man.

It Came from Youtube

From the beginning of time, man has tried its best to try to conquer the loins of the female as his own. This may prove to be hard at the very least, but it becomes even harder once they have already been conquered by another man. However, all it not lost.

Seems simple enough, eh? Barring of course the fact that it all might backfire and you might fail completely and/or get arrested.


(via)

You ever watch TV where people are watching something on TV? Most of the stuff is just some made up show to take up a few seconds of screen time, but sometimes it's an actual show or commercial that you recognize. It's like you're getting extra bang for your cable bill buck- TV within TV.  How deep do we get to go before they start charging us extra? Crap, I told myself I wouldn't make any Inception jokes, or I wouldn't be able to stop.  I think.

Condensation

I love sounding condescending. It makes you feel so important, at least compared to the other person. (Oh my god I am joking are you guys serious?) I'm pretty sure the best way to sound condescending is to call someone a really horrible nickname. “Hey Bud.” “My name is Johnathan.” “You shut your mouth when you're talking to me.”

Using the nickname 'Sport' ironically pretty much makes you sound like a big condescending dickwad. Others may include 'Chief', 'Kiddo,' and 'Champ'. Thanks Coach, you really make me feel like a winner.

On the internet, we use the term 'bro,' as in “Cool Story Bro.” If anyone says this, you can pretty much take it as “Hey, you wrote some stuff there, and just to let you know, it sucked balls. But better luck next time.”

If you start something with "Yo Dawg" I can't imagine whatever following it is going to be very intellectual though.  The same goes for "Oh My God" - such as in "Oh my god you guys, you will never guess what happened."  Uh, we probably will, but we could really care less.

Troll Science

Science today is so lacking of creativity, it makes it hard to get anything done. However, anything is possible if you ignore sound scientific facts. That's why there's troll science. Fuckin' science...

while we're at it, screw art too.
 Impossible to make perpetual motion?  I'll take two incomplete perpetual motion devices and use them to power each other!
"But doesn't that just make one big one?"
Yes, and that's why it's called troll science.

4chan Friday

This week on 4chan Friday, I bring you /o/ and /f/

/o/ stand for Auto- as you can tell just by the name, it's about cars. New cars, old cars, car designs, car fuck-ups, you got them all. Being one to laugh at the misfortune of others, I especially like the last one. For instance, here's a picture of what happens when you don't notice a large section of wire fencing being slowly wrapped around your drive shaft as you move along.
And of course, bad screws ups would be nothing without hilarious reaction faces to go with them. It seems people who like to talk about cars and people who like to be smart asses are one in the same.

/f/ stands for flash. No, not the superhero, but the app. If you're on your Ipad right now, you're probably screwed for this part. However If you don't buy shitty Apple products, this will be entertaining. Since files on 4chan usually get deleted after a couple hours or so, and I don't know how to download an .swf, I won't post one. However, you can always go through and look whats up at the time. I have posted several of them before, to great success and hilarity. If you want to do so yourself, get the code from here. Then simply replace "2bigpinkballs2.swf" in both spots with the link to another one anywhere on the internet. You may also have to change the width and height to suit your page as well. Happy Trolling!

Jelly Bean Flavors

In homage to “Robots with Feelings” and their different types of Jelly Bean flavors, I though I would come up some myself. Any similarities between his and mine are completely coincidental. If you come across one that happens to be the same then you really didn't actually see what you saw, and actually saw something completely different. Now disclaimer aside...

Snow
Yellow Snow
Salt
Garlic Salt
Garlic Pepper
Jelly Bean (aka Paradox flavored)
New Car Smell
That taste of citrus after you brush your teeth
The Common Cold
The Uncommon Cold
Teen Spirit
Pride
Broken Pride
Drinking Through A Straw
A deep breath
A deep breath under water
Mixture of all the sodas from the soda fountain

It Came from Youtube


Look at the majestic Kiwi, in all of its glory. Watch as it modifies its own habitat to suit its needs. Watch as it fulfills its one and only dream of flying before making a triumphant exit from the word. Doesn't it just bring a tear to your eye?


There is only one person who can read Lady Gaga's Poker face, and that is Christopher Walken. His rendition of "Oh ooh ah oh ooh ah" is beyond words. Really, trying to sing-talk the nonsense lyrics to Lady Gaga is like tying to put Dubstep Wobble on paper. There really are no words, or even letters that you can fit exactly.

wub wub wub wub wub wub...

A Very Memelicious Halloween

Well I had a very fun Halloween. First, I made my pedobear mask:

complete with "free candy" signs
 Next came carving pumpkins:
Finally, I ate some candy:
You know what candy really sucks?  Almond Joy.  Then there's also people who give out stuff like popcorn and animal crackers.  If you are one of those people who hand out shit like that, I will personally come to your house and tie you to a radiator while shoving your beloved coconut-almond lump down your throat.